General Discussion

A young couple on the brink of divorce visit a marriage counselor. The counselor asks the wife what is the problem. She responds " My husband suffers from premature ejaculation." The counselor turns to her husband and inquires "Is that true?" The husband replies "Well not exactly, it's her that suffers not me."

Hello ladies.

Q: Whats the difference between pink and purple? A: The grip.

how are you today my lovely??????????????

Little Johnny's father says to him, "When you go back to your Mom's tonight, give her this envelope. Tell her that since you are now 18 this is the LAST check she'll ever see from me for child support. Then, stand back and watch the expression her face." "OK" replied Little Johnny. Later when Little Johnny got home he said to his mom, "Mom, Dad asked me to give you this envelope. He said to tell you that since I'm now 18 this is the LAST child support payment he'll ever have to make to you. Now I'm supposed to stand back and watch the expression on your face." "Next time you visit your father tell him that after 18 years I have decided to inform him that…

u lot probably have too, but i think its quality! A university lecturer reminds her students of tomorrow's final exam. "Now, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart-arse bloke in the back of the room raised his hand and asks, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best to stifle their laughter. When silence is restored, the lecturer smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and swe…

A pig with a flick knife

i havent found another joke that has gotten such an instant, and continuous laugh fomr me in years! wot do u say to woman with TWO black eyes? nothing...uve told the bitch twice!

Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake. The average person can't. This is this cat This is is cat This is how cat This is to cat This is keep cat This is a cat This is dumbass cat This is busy cat This is for cat This is forty cat This is seconds cat Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top down and I betcha you can't resist passing it on.

Suggestions please ! ... http://community.clubtheworld.uk/showflat.php?Cat=&Board=UBB12&Number=206978&page=0&view=collapsed&sb=5&o=&fpart=&vc=

Stop changing ur MSN nick!!!

Well what do you think of this site i've been working on at work. It's for a club called Influence in Sleaford. They've got a pretty amazing line up coming up soon. Which i shall be gracing for sure. I do believe my boss is playing then too. Well check it out. So glad to see the back of it now, even though i've still got to build the admin side. http://www.clubinfluence.com

just luv the smell off meat cooking

bin to the FRINEDS AND FAMILY NIGHT, in manchester...at the roadhouse???...now i have ur attention! lol

wot's wiv the pic of Liza Minelli as ur avatar? thought u wud've had her mum, saint judy (minus the coke round her nose)

Mary had a little skirt with splits right up the sides and every time that Mary walked the boys could see her thighs. Mary had another skirt twas split right up the front but she didn't wear that one very often ---------------------- Mary had a little lamb Her father shot it dead. Now it goes to school with her, between two chunks of bread. ----------------------------------------- Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, Her clothes all tattered and torn. It wasn't the spider that sat down beside her, But Little Boy Blue and his horn. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------…

Becuase of a member of this site i am leaving this board 4ever, because of his nasty commnets and because he hates my signature goodbye

I got 2 interview this week and two next week, it looks that i may be getting a job in that big wide world

the airline that caused the injury 2 my arm @ easter has admitted 2 my employer that they were @ fault 4 the door fallin on my arm nearly breakin it in the process. this shud make it that little bit easier wen i put my claim in 4 compo i jus hope they settle outta court, and don't drag it on 4 yrs

no names yet, i'm calling her puppy at the mo!!!! any suggestions? she is just about the cutest thing i have ever seen bruvva

bin in mancs now for a while..and ive got to that - "if i go into town once more, ill be going round and round again" stage...and as im thinnking of leeds for uni, i was wondering form any of those lurvley ppl out there...to share me their knowledge of clubs to go to in leeds, like the leeds version of sinergy, and spell bound, etc etc....id be grateful with any tips

That thread that mister moo created about the pic that has been sent to his mate or sumthing...is it safe to open? Im in work see...and have been dying to open it but it might be rude?

what has more use? a mop or an iron?

Does any1 know that this is?

wish me luck,

didnt see u in afters marks set time got changed at the last minute last night so he ended up playin last set instead of first. thought i saw pepsi at the end but wsnt sure it was her so didnt say ello or ask where u were still got ur birfday card ere that i made last night

hi phil its leedzlad iv just finished listening to ure mix cd and its well good iv really enjoyed listening to it also had my mates round and they love it too everything is spot on also good tracklist!!!! i will be intouch at a later date r.e. my club night thanks david!

there u go, a FAO jst 4 u!

Just heard this of "another" website, due to massive sales (30'000 on first day), [censored] Hostile is headed towards the UK top 10!!! Apparantly Glazza has been contacted by TOTP about an appearance on next weeks broadcast!

Go on do it!!!!! I've finally got my act together and sorted out mt home computer. My email is Adam_Jukes@hotmail.com id anyone wants to add me to msn