>>> > > > Following a night out with a few friends, a man brought

>>>them

>>> >back

>>> >

>>> > > >to show off his new flat. After the grand tour, the visitors

>>> >were rather

>>> >

>>> > > >perplexed by the large gong taking pride of place in the

>>> >lounge. "What's

>>> >

>>> > > >that big brass gong for?" one of the guests asked. "Why,

>>> >that's my

>>> >

>>> > > >Speaking Clock" the man replied. "How does it work?" "I'll

>>> >show you",

>>> >

>>> > > >the man said, giving the gong an ear-shattering blow with an

>>> >unpadded

>>> >

>>> > > >hammer.

>>> >

>>> > > >Suddenly, a

>>> >

>>> > > >voice from the other side of the wall screamed, "For ****

>>> >sake, you

>>> >

>>> > > >b*stard, it's twenty to two in the ****ing morning!!"