Ethel and her Wheelchair

> Ethel is a bit of a demon in her wheelchair,

> > and loves to charge around

> > the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and

> > getting up to

> > maximum speed on the long corridors.

> > Because she and her fellow residents are one

> > sandwich short of a

> > picnic, they all tolerate each other, some of the

> > males actually join in.

> > One day, Ethel was speeding up one corridor when a

> > door opened and

> > Bonkers Barry stepped out of his room with his arm

> > outstretched.

> > "STOP!!" he said in a firm voice. "Have you got a

> > license for that thing?"

> > Ethel fished around in her handbag and pulled out a

> > Kit Kat wrapper

> > and held it up to him. "OK" he said, and away Ethel

> > sped down the hall.

> > As she took the corner near the TV lounge on one

> > wheel, Weird William

> > popped out in front of her and shouted, "STOP!! Have

> > you got proof of

> > insurance?"

> > Ethel dug into her handbag, pulled out a beer

> > coaster and held it up

> > to him. William nodded and said, "Carry on, maam."

> > As Ethel neared the final corridor before the front

> > door, Mad Mike

> > stepped out in front of her, stark naked, holding a

> > very sizeable

> > (for his age) erection in his hand.

> > "Oh, no!" said Ethel, "Not the breathalyzer again!"