WOMEN'S ENGLISH:

 

Yes = No.

No = Yes.

Maybe = No.

We need = I want.

I'm sorry = You'll be sorry.

We need to talk = I need to complain.

Sure, go ahead = I don't want you to.

Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful.

Do what you want = You'll pay for this later.

I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!

Are you listening to me?? = Too late, you're dead.

You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me.

Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs.

You're so .... manly = You need a shave and you sweat alot.

Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.

It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game

on TV.

How much do you love me? = I did something today that you're really

not going to like.

 

MEN'S ENGLISH:

I'm hungry = I'm hungry.

I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy.

I'm tired = I'm tired.

Nice dress = Nice cleavage!

I love you = Let's have s*x now.

I'm bored = Do you want to have s*x?

What's wrong? = I guess s*x is out of the question.

May I have this dance? = I'd like to have s*x with you.

Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have s*x with you.

Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have s*x with you.

Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have s*x with you.

You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to have s*x with

you within the next ten minutes.

Let's talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep

person and then I'd like to have s*x

with you

I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay

 

 

too true

So what does a woman think when I use the chat-up line "Nice dress, but I don't think those shoes go with the outfit?"

So do ya wanna do out to dinner then on Saturday??

ur askin blink that?

 

My fiancee would definately agree to most of that lot.................

 

 

espiecally the one about "do you love me?"