Englishman, Frenchman and a Scotsman

An englishman, a frenchman and a scotsman were on a long train journey. As time passed conversation turned, as it always does, to sex. More time passed and they discussed how to turn women on.

'Well' said the englishman, 'I cover my wife's important little places with honey and lick it off, very, very slowly'. It drives my wife into ecstasy every time.

'Me' said the frenchman 'I tickle my wife in those important little places with a feather. it drives her absolutely wild'.

'Well' says the scotsman, 'I throw my wife on the bed, sh*g her senseless, whip my cock out and wipe it on the curtains. it drives her f***ing mental'.