My nephew who is a bright, intelligent 5 year old child made me my mum and sis piss ourselves laffing tonight. He doesnt half come out with sum well funny random things. Things u dont expect a 5 year old to come out with!

 

About once a month, me, my sis, connor (my nephew) and my brother in law go to this cantonese resturant called The Wild Swan. And he loves it and all the staff love him to bits coz he is so comical!

 

My sis, connor and I had to pop into town this evening and on the way back - we went passed the wild swan. To which he made this comment.."mammy, aunty Moira look..it's The Wild Swan. Shall we go in and have "the last supper" and pretend to be Jesus and the deciples and drink red wine and have the body of christ?"

 

I thought this was highly amusing for a 5 year old to come out with sumthing so funny! Kids are ACE!

 

Bless him

 

I dont care if none of u care but i just thought id share that with you!

 

*LOL*

 

we used to say "Thanks be to God" at various points during mass.

 

of course i was well getting into this repetitive chanting, like, when i was younger. then one day the priest came round to our house to have a chat with my parents about proper catholic upbringing and i said, as i saw his car pull up in the drive:

 

"is that Peter God???"

 

(say it out loud in case you don't get it)

 

*puts on serious face*

 

I know what you mean, Storm, Sin' youngest, is great at singing songs with the wrong lyrics, the one that I always think of is "System Of A Down" he sings

 

" Why can't you tell me whyyyyyyyy IIIIIIIIII Am your PiEEEEEEEEEEEE"

TomD said:

*LOL*

 

we used to say "Thanks be to God" at various points during mass.

 

 

Christ aye!

 

What was that thing when u had to shake hands?

 

shaking hands in church, who'd have thought it.

 

peace be with you.

 

it's amazing though.

kisses from birds at xmas.

although they're usually not exactly stunners.

TomD said:

shaking hands in church, who'd have thought it.

 

peace be with you.

 

 

hahah for sum odd reason im finding all this fooking hillarious!!

 

worst thing however is confession. it's very strange when you're a kid.

 

"what did you do bad this week. tell god"

- "erm... i had an argument with my brother"

"ok, go and say two hail marys"

- "right"

"Forgive me father, for I have sinned, it has been 2 days sincle my last confession. My sins are :

 

"I swore at my brother"

"I argues with my mother"

"I smoked"

"I stole £1 out of my mothers pocket"

"I had my first wank over jesus on the crucifx last night"

haha

 

what i don't get is, the almighty sees everything, so why you have to repeat all your sins in confession? surely that must bore him to tears "YES I KNOW ALL THIS ALREADY, PLEASE SHUT UP, I FORGIVE YOU, FOR FUCKS SAKE"

TomD said:

haha

 

what i don't get is, the almighty sees everything, so why you have to repeat all your sins in confession?

 

Well if that's the case im guna have the most filthiest sex on the weekend so he can watch.

it'll have to be in widescreen

That can be arranged.

on second thoughts, best not, it'd probably be an excuse for moo to get his knob out in front of Him.

hahah scrap that then

i couldn't be bothered to read this post but i thought i would let you know maria that i've finished usin ya batteries and you can have them back now for your toy!! cheers hun!!