When I was 16, I hoped that one day I would have a boyfriend ...

 

When I was 18, I got a boyfriend, but there was no passion. So I decided I

needed a passionate guy with a zest for life. In college, I dated a

passionate guy, but he was too emotional. Everything was an emergency, he

cried all the time and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a guy with

stability.

 

When I was 25, I found a very stable guy but he was boring. He was totally

predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became so dull that

I decided I needed a guy with some excitement.

 

When I was 28, I found an exciting guy, but I couldn't keep up with him. He

always got mad, he did impetuous things and flirted with everyone he met.

He made me miserable as often as happy. He was very energetic, but

directionless. So I decided to find a guy with some ambition.

 

When I turned 31, I found a smart, ambitious guy with his feet planted

firmly on the ground and married him. He was so ambitious that he divorced

me, took everything I owned, and ran off with my best friend.

 

I am now 40, and I'm looking for a guy with a big dick

 

 

 

 

 

Right, I'm spiking his Stella for that one......