1. On a blanket from Taiwan -

>NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.

>

>2. On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists -

>REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU.

>

>3. On a Taiwanese shampoo -

>USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.

>

>4. On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink -

>AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.

>

>5. On a New Zealand insect spray -

>THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.

>

>6. In a US guide to setting up a new computer -

>TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO

>ROOM TEMPERATURE

>BEFORE OPENING.

>(Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)

>

>7. On a Japanese product used to relieve painful hemorrhoids -

>LIE DOWN ON BED AND INSERT POSCOOL SLOWLY UP TO THE PROJECTED

>PORTION LIKE

>A SWORD-GUARD INTO ANAL DUCT. WHILE INSERTING POSCOOL FOR

>APPROXIMATELY 5

>MINUTES, KEEP QUIET.

>

>8. In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles -

>OPEN OTHER END.

>

>9. On a packet of Sunmaid raisins -

>WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL?

>

>10. On a Sears hairdryer -

>DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.

>

>11. On a bag of Fritos -

>YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE.

>(The shoplifter special!)

>

>12. On a bar of Dial soap -

>DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.

>(And that would be how?)

>

>13. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box) -

>DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.

>(Too late! You lose!)

>

>14. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -

>PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.

>(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

>

>15. On a Korean kitchen knife -

>WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.

>(Dammit! Who are they to tell me what to do with my kids?)

>

>16. On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights -

>FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.

>(As opposed to use in outer space?)

>

>17. On a Japanese food processor -

>NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.

>(Now I'm curious.)

>

>18. On Sainsbury's peanuts -

>WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.

>(Really? Peanuts contain nuts?)

>

>19. On an American Airlines packet of nuts

>INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.

>(I'm glad they cleared that up.)

>

>20. On a Swedish chainsaw -

>DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.

>(What kind of consumer phone-call led to this warning?)

>

>21. On a child's superman costume - WEARING OF THIS GARMENT

>DOES NOT

>ENABLE YOU TO FLY.

>(That's right, destroy a universal childhood fantasy!)

>

>22. On some frozen dinners:

>SERVING SUGGESTION: DEFROST.

>

>23. On a hotel provided shower cap in a box:

>FITS ONE HEAD.

>

>24. On packaging for a Rowenta iron:

>DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.

>

>25. On Boot's "Children's" cough medicine:

>DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.

>

>26. On Nightly sleep aid:

>WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.

 

pmsl, thats the funniest thing i've seen all day

* falls off chair... *

Snez said:

pmsl, thats the funniest thing i've seen all day

i aim to please!!

omg my stomache hurts from laffing

hahah quality mate.

jon_m said:

>20. On a Swedish chainsaw -

>DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.

>(What kind of consumer phone-call led to this warning?)

 

this kinda -> http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?lastnode_id=47420&node_id=691158

OOOOOOPPPPS.........its 02:47am as i write this - ive just laughed so much i woke my girlfriend up!

 

Shes not amused, maybe i should get her to read it, might cheer her up.

 

Quality

LiamStyles said:

OOOOOOPPPPS.........its 02:47am as i write this - ive just laughed so much i woke my girlfriend up!

 

Shes not amused, maybe i should get her to read it, might cheer her up.

 

Quality

PMSL !! Funniest thing iv read in ages

dat was well funni!!!!