Capn_Jack said:

rachel said:

after being in love and then having my heart broken i seriously don't think i EVER want to be in love again.

 

I pretty much feel the same way, although I live in hope that I will meet the right person and allow myself to feel that way again.

 

I think it is all to do with how badly you've been hurt, as to wether/when you Allow yourself to start feeling those emotions again

"This thing you call love, she smiles way too much"

liquideyes said:

rachel said:

Cherry said:

You'll get there sweetie, and while you're taking your time about it, there'll be a queue of pretty hopefuls forming round the block

I find comments like that so [censored] patronising.

I totally agree!

 

Cherry, don't you see Rachel's point? She said she's not looking for love! Do you assume that all single people must be unhappy or incomplete?

 

Bleedin hell! i wasn't even talking to Rachel! i don't know Rachel, i've never spoken to her and know nothing about her to comment! My comment was aimed at Capn Jack (NOT AT RACHEL) who said he LIVES IN HOPE of finding someone to love, etc. (i.e. the right relationship is what he WANTS for himself).

 

Jesus!

 

Rachel if you're happy being single good luck to you; i really don't have an opinion on your life at all.

Cherry - i know that comment was not aimed at me and that you meant well by it, which is why i said i wasn't having a go at you.

 

But people do say things like that when its really not necessary, and can make the person feel inadequate or sorry for themselves when really there is no need to.

 

 

Clubbing_Si said:

rachel said:

after being in love and then having my heart broken i seriously don't think i EVER want to be in love again.

 

its worth it tho!!! dont think i could live without being loved

 

hmm about any1 in particular

 

i feel the same though iv not been so happy in a very long time.

Cherry said:

Bleedin hell! i wasn't even talking to Rachel!

Calm down! All I said was that, I agree that "comments like that" are patronising.

 

I don't think that what Captain Jack needs is people saying "de-dums, I'm sure there's somebody out there for you". I think it would be more positive if he learned to enjoy singledom more; and as they say, "it never comes along when you're expecting it". People are more attractive when they are happy, but if you're unhappy because you're not in a relationship, it could be a vicious circle.

 

Jesus!

Easy now with the blasphemy! Apologies for my misunderstanding, I got mixed up who you were talking to.

liquideyes said:

People are more attractive when they are happy, but if you're unhappy because you're not in a relationship, it could be a vicious circle.

 

Yep, when i was single and really WANTED a boyfriend i just couldn't get one (or not the right sort, or couldn't keep hold of the right sort). i must have seemed desperate, which is obviously very unattractive.

 

As soon as i thought, "Actually this single malarky is pretty good! Do what i want, when i want" along came Alex to [censored] it all up again! lol (joke, he's fantastic and i wouldn't be without him)

 

But yes, i reckon the best way to get a boyfriend IF YOU WANT ONE is to enjoy NOT having one!

Cherry said:

liquideyes said:

People are more attractive when they are happy, but if you're unhappy because you're not in a relationship, it could be a vicious circle.

 

Yep, when i was single and really WANTED a boyfriend i just couldn't get one (or not the right sort, or couldn't keep hold of the right sort). i must have seemed desperate, which is obviously very unattractive.

 

As soon as i thought, "Actually this single malarky is pretty good! Do what i want, when i want" along came Alex to [censored] it all up again! lol (joke, he's fantastic and i wouldn't be without him)

 

But yes, i reckon the best way to get a boyfriend IF YOU WANT ONE is to enjoy NOT having one!

 

 

defiantely all true

Clubbing_Si said:

Cherry said:

liquideyes said:

People are more attractive when they are happy, but if you're unhappy because you're not in a relationship, it could be a vicious circle.

 

Yep, when i was single and really WANTED a boyfriend i just couldn't get one (or not the right sort, or couldn't keep hold of the right sort). i must have seemed desperate, which is obviously very unattractive.

 

As soon as i thought, "Actually this single malarky is pretty good! Do what i want, when i want" along came Alex to [censored] it all up again! lol (joke, he's fantastic and i wouldn't be without him)

 

But yes, i reckon the best way to get a boyfriend IF YOU WANT ONE is to enjoy NOT having one!

 

 

defiantely all true

 

somethin u wana tell us si?

ok - edit that post and replace bloke with gal lol

 

A few thoughts...

 

Love means you are suddenly dependant on something or someone to make you happy. This is very un-healthy. You should not be dependant on anything, ever. Having said that you are dependant on your mother & father in the early years.

 

When you die no one loves you and you love no-one, so why bother ?

 

Love is dangerous - it can get in the way of sound decision making.

 

Love is amazing - you suddenly feel you have 1000% extra backing/support from a loved one and feel you can in fact achieve ANYTHING.

 

Being in love, breaking up and then finding love again is very healthy - it makes you more confident and confidence is the KEY to EVERYTHING in (this) life. Being knocked down, feeling like you are never going to get anywhere and then circumstances changing over night and then finding another/different partner makes you realise that its extrememly unlikely that you will grow old alone.

 

EVERYONE finds someone.

 

Looking for love is a POINTLESS excercise - you will not be looking in the right place. I feel that your loved one is destined for you - go with the flow.

 

I feel that finding a loved one is a 'reward' for doing well in life. Havent you ever noticed that when you do a good thing a series of good things happen, and when you do a bad/negative thing a serious of bad things happen ? Good and bad are defined PER INDIVIDUAL (one person's set of rules may not be the same as someone else's). We dont choose these rules but we know whether we are doing things right or wrong by going with our 'gut feelings'. GO WITH THE FLOW.

 

If you are really having that much trouble finding a partner in the area(s) you live you are probably not destined to meet your partner there. SAVE & TRAVEL, loads.

 

(Disclaimer: These are my 'top of the head' thoughts on this at 12.13 today, they may not be the same thoughts & feelings I have on this subject tomorrow).

 

I agree with rachel - there is nothing WORSE than people taking pity on you.

I feel sorry for Rachel, you'll someone soon matey.

James said:

A few thoughts...

 

Love means you are suddenly dependant on something or someone to make you happy. This is very un-healthy. You should not be dependant on anything, ever. Having said that you are dependant on your mother & father in the early years.

 

When you die no one loves you and you love no-one, so why bother ?

 

Love is dangerous - it can get in the way of sound decision making.

 

Love is amazing - you suddenly feel you have 1000% extra backing/support from a loved one and feel you can in fact achieve ANYTHING.

 

Being in love, breaking up and then finding love again is very healthy - it makes you more confident and confidence is the KEY to EVERYTHING in (this) life. Being knocked down, feeling like you are never going to get anywhere and then circumstances changing over night and then finding another/different partner makes you realise that its extrememly unlikely that you will grow old alone.

 

EVERYONE finds someone.

 

Looking for love is a POINTLESS excercise - you will not be looking in the right place. I feel that your loved one is destined for you - go with the flow.

 

I feel that finding a loved one is a 'reward' for doing well in life. Havent you ever noticed that when you do a good thing a series of good things happen, and when you do a bad/negative thing a serious of bad things happen ? Good and bad are defined PER INDIVIDUAL (one person's set of rules may not be the same as someone else's). We dont choose these rules but we know whether we are doing things right or wrong by going with our 'gut feelings'. GO WITH THE FLOW.

 

If you are really having that much trouble finding a partner in the area(s) you live you are probably not destined to meet your partner there. SAVE & TRAVEL, loads.

 

(Disclaimer: These are my 'top of the head' thoughts on this at 12.13 today, they may not be the same thoughts & feelings I have on this subject tomorrow).

 

I agree with rachel - there is nothing WORSE than people taking pity on you.

 

I agree with all of that. Especially the bit about getting over love making you a better person.

 

Love is like a catalyst for emotion. It just excaudates the way you feel. It makes the good times great and the bad times crippling. You cant choose who you fall in love with, but you have 50% input towards the person you stay with. I think a lot of people stop with the first person they fall in love with, nomatter how well they get on.

Lil_Zippy said:

It just excaudates the way you feel.

 

It does what ?

excaudate