mental health hotline...

[Guest saffysue]

b4 u read this...yes i understand mental health, this is to be taken lightly, i know depression inside out n even i can smile at this!!

 

Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline:

>

> If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

> If you are co-dependant, please ask someone else to press 2 for you.

> If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

> If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want.

> Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

> If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the

> mother ship.

> If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you > which number to press.

> If you are a manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, > no one will answer.

> If you are dyslexic, press 969696969696969696.

> If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the star key until a

> representative comes on the line.

> If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, telephone

> number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden

> name.

> If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, s-l-o-w-l-y and

> c-a-r-e-f-u-l-l-y press 0 0 0.

> If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep, or

> before the beep, or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

> If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory

> loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have

> short-term memory loss, press 9.

> If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All operators are too busy

> to talk to you.

> If you are blonde don't press any buttons, you'll just screw it up.

 

and yes I am blonde!

[Bungle]

Genius!

 

Whats going on sue? You never used to be funny.....

[Guest saffysue]

OMG!!!!

i'm gonna whoop yer ass next time I cu matey boy!!

[Bungle]

Fair enough!

 

You can do it while yojis on