relationships Long distance relationships

[Wub Wub]

Long distance relationships can go one of two ways.

 

You can have either a wikkid time, not getting under the feet of the one you love, and making the time together all the more special.

 

Or you can develop trust issues, and then watch the whole thing collapse because of one stupid little mistake that you did which you can't expect the other other person to forgive you for, and you therefore spend the rest of your days hating yourself.

 

 

It's a two edged sword.

[James]

I'm inclined to say "just dont rush it", I did and it all fooked up what was a very very good relationship. The problem with rushing it, when you've only known each other a year, is that either one or both of you will expect another amazing event to happen quickly - for example a year after moving in you may both feel the need for another radical change. And when it doesnt happen you may become bored of each other / start going out seperately.

 

If it were 2 or 3 years you'd been going out I'd say go for it - but a year aint that long and perhaps the reason you are getting on so well is because you arent in each others' faces all the time.

 

Of course only you can judge what it would be like to live with each other and whether or not a honeymoon period would exist or if it would be forever wonderful. Everyones different and I believe there are people out there who could meet one day and move in that night and be happy forever after, but also people who could be seeing each other for 10 years, move in and then immediately fall out.

 

Just dont do what i did and suggest that your partner gives up [censored] and everything. That was the point it went wrong with me.

 

Perhaps the best test is to go away on lots of weekend breaks or week long holidays together first so that you really know whether you can get on 24/7 - and see each others' true colours.

 

Having said all the above, in real life (i.e. not on a message board where we're all trying to be sensible) I would say "F*CKING GO FOR IT MATE - WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TO LOSE" ! Its not often you get to experience such strong feelings for one another so DONT WASTE THEM - get the most out of them TODAY. Live for today. Dont regret anything. Things that go tits up you can just 'put down to experience and move on'. Far too many people like me analyze things and this is the f*ck up - dont think too hard - if it feels right it IS right. But just remember that there are no gaurantees that you will always be able to tell what your partner's true feelings for you are or that you will be as happy as you are today in 10, 20, 50 years time with her.

 

Get the most out of your relationship but be prepared that there is a very slim possibility that these feelings may not last forever...

[Claire DC]

Long distance is hard but it can [censored], my sister is proof that it can, she met a lad while on holiday when she was 17, she lived in Manchester, him in Sussex and they survived a holiday romance AND long distance relationship and have been together 15 years and married for 10 with their first child (5 months old nearly) so i know it definately CAN [censored]!!

 

On one hand it can be good cos u value the time u spend together so much more than if u had them "on hand" whenever and u dont get up each others arses all the time, but on the other hand, it takes a lot to make it [censored], long journeys, phonecalls, msn chats.... basically whatever u can to make it [censored].... because u lack the physical contact u want/need u have to find other ways to feel "connected" to the person!!

 

Its hard not bein able to have cuddle or feel that special closeness u feel when ur with them and the ache u feel when ur not with them and sometimes that can get too much for people, but my feeling is, is that if u both WANT it to [censored] then i dont seen any reason why it wouldnt, if u both put the effort in (ie not leave it more to one person to make all the effort) and the feelings are there then it can [censored] out brilliantly!!

 

As for moving nearer to her/in with her then u really only know that answer for urself, do u WANT to make the move, if so DO IT if not then DONT cos ull only end up hating it and maybe even resenting her for "making?" you move and give up everythin, its a 2 way thing and u cant be expected just to drop everythin and move away unless thats what u actually want!!

[NeoN]

Hey . You only live once so i say go 4 it

 

[Clubbing Si]

ive just started a long distance relationship (at the most its 400 miles apart and at the least 130 miles (uni or home))

 

were already very close and i think things are brilliant between us, the only downside is that we cant see each other as often as we'd like 2, however when we do see each other its been longer and is much better!

 

apart from heartaches on the phone at night when we'd wish to be closer id say that it is manageable and its not to hard. u just need to get into the frame of mind ure not gonna be together every night (which can be a healthy thing)

 

bushy mate, just see how it goes and dont worry to much, in my own experience id say its do-able and most defiantely worth it, especially if ure with sum1 you really care for.

[Geordie Becky]

I think long distance relationships can be hard, i think they are even hard for people who have been together years and love eachother to bits, however its only hard because the two people care for eachother so much, so like wub said it can either go one of two ways, itll be great because its so much more quality when u see eachother or u simply wont be able to handle a "part-time" relationship.

 

Just because a long distance relationship doesnt [censored] for one couple doesnt mean it wont for another so whatever happens give it a shot and see what happens!

 

You also can not help how u feel about someone and if you know for sure how strongly you feel for her and she feels the same then why not give the movin in thing a shot? you can only say that u have tried and it may make u stronger!

 

I am in a long distance relationship and it is goin well, but i do miss him when im not with him, but then dont you miss your mates when you arent with them and you do not break friends because u do not see them enough do you?

 

Good luck with whatever you decide hun.

[Scream]

MOVE TO LINCOLN then i'll stay here, lol.

 

Mate as you knwo i was in one for 2yrs still miss her loads even though we broke up. In the end it just got to hard to see each other.

[Sweet]

They are great if you can get someone you can trust and not hafta worry so much. The distance is a major downer and the farther away the harder. Too hard to see the other person, even though once you do get together its great.

 

I am in one now and he's the greatest person in the world to me. I am glad I met him and can't wait to spend some 'quality' time with him besides a phone.

 

In a long distance relationship it takes both sides to make it [censored]. So if you both [censored] at it then it's great

[fantastique]

i agree, but it gets even more difficult when the person you have difficulty trusting is yourself...

 

so do you live in the states then? whereabouts?

damn, it must be really tough. i find it hard enough having my boy a couple of hours away

[Sweet]

i agree, but it gets even more difficult when the person you have difficulty trusting is yourself...

 

so do you live in the states then? whereabouts?

damn, it must be really tough. i find it hard enough having my boy a couple of hours away

 

yeah i live in west virginia.. it's so hard but soon will be over with.. cos be together soon. it's hard but i know he'll be worth it all

[fantastique]

i'm really glad things are going well for you two - best of luck.

 

w. virginia? cool, are you studying there? my sister just moved to dc like two weeks ago

[Sweet]

ahh i [censored] full time..now got something special to [censored] towards..not that far from DC.... thinkin bout doing some schoolin online so i can take it with me...

[Claire DC]

not that far from DC....

 

 

Im now in a long distance relationship, well have been seein him for a lil while now but its just gone "official" and it is hard but i know its worth it and makes the time we spend together even more amazin then it would be cos we do have to make up for lost time with it!! It would be better to live close by each other obviously but we get by and we speak everyday etc so dont go without any form of contact!!

[Shenlong]

Some people are suited for long distance relationships, some aren't, just have to find the right person like i have

 

If things are meant to be then generally they will have a way of working themselves out even if things are difficult in the meanwhile.

[Clubbing Si]

well spoken!!!! thats y u read the news!