The worst one I've heard in a while........

[LuShY]

A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day there he

takes

off his clothes and starts to wander around.

A gorgeous petite blonde walks by, smiles as she passes, and the man

immediately gets an erection. The woman notices his erection, comes over

to

him and says, "Did you call for me?"

The man replies "No; what do you mean?"

She says, "You must be new here. Let me explain. It's a rule here that

if

you get an erection it implies you called for me."

Smiling, she leads him to the side of the swimming pool, lies down on a

towel, eagerly pulls him to her and happily lets him have his way with

her.

The man happily continues to explore the colony's facilities. He enters

the

sauna and as he sits down, he farts.

Within minutes a huge, hairy man lumbers out of the steam room toward

him,

Did you call for me?" says the hairy man.

"No; what do you mean?" says the newcomer.

"You must be new," says the hairy man, "it's a rule that if you fart, it

implies that you called for me." The huge man easily spins him around,

bends

him over a bench and has his way with him.

The newcomer staggers back to the colony office, where he is greeted by

the

smiling, naked receptionist, "May I help you?" she says.

The man yells, "Here's my membership card. You can have the key back and

you

can keep the £200 membership fee."

"But sir," she replies, "you've only been here for a few hours. You

haven't

had the chance to see all our facilities."

The man replies, "Listen lady, I'm 68 years old; I only get an erection

once

a month, but I fart 15 times a day! I'm outta here.

 

[Claire DC]