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How To Shower Like a Woman;-

 

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper

according to lights and darks.

 

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

 

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

 

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

 

Get in the shower.

 

Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah

and pumice stone.

 

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with added botanicals.

 

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

 

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner .

 

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 3 minutes until

glowy pink.

 

Wash entire rest of body with gingerbread sugar scrub.

 

Rinse conditioner out of hair.

 

Shave armpits and legs.

 

Turn off shower.

 

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

 

Spray mould spots with Tilex.

 

Get out of shower.

 

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

 

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

 

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

 

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

 

 

How To Shower Like a Man;-

 

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave

them in a pile.

 

Walk naked to the bathroom.

 

If you see wife along the way, shake dick at her making the

'woo-woo'

sound.

 

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

 

Admire the size of your dick and scratch your butt.

 

Get in the shower. Wash your face.

 

Wash your armpits.

 

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

 

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

 

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

 

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

 

Pee.

 

Rinse off and get out of shower.

 

Partially dry off.

 

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out

of tub the whole time.

 

Admire wiener size in mirror again.

 

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

 

Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

 

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake dick at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.

 

Throw wet towel on bed.

 

I KNOW YOU'RE LAUGHING BECAUSE MOST OF THIS IS TRUE!!!!!!

 

🎧20,000 Hardcore members,  I say the future is ours🎧

 

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