cluck cluck

[Shaney_R]

Gary came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as he

often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep.He gave

her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep.

 

When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing

a long flowing white robe.

 

"Who the hell are you?" Demanded Gary, "and what are you doing in my

bedroom?".

 

The mysterious Man answered "This isn't your bedroom and I'm St Peter".

 

Gary was stunned "You mean I'm dead!!! That can't be, I have so much to

live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family....you've got to send me

back straight away".

 

St Peter replied "Yes, you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We can

only send you back as a dog or a hen."

 

Gary was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house,

he asked to be sent back as a hen. A flash of light later he was

covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground.

 

"This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this strange feeling welling up

inside him.

 

The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new hen, how are

you enjoying your first day here?"

 

"It's not so bad" replies Gary, "but I have this strange feeling inside like

I'm about to explode".

 

"You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never laid

an egg before".

 

"Never" replies Gary

 

"Well just relax and let it happen"

 

And so he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops out

from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and

his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the

first time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was

overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best

feeling that ever happened to him...ever!!!

 

The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he felt an

enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife shouting

 

"Gary, wake up you drunken bas*ard, you're sh*tting the bed"

[Miss Minx]

haha nice

[fifedjdomo]

brilliant!