Marriage

[Guest saffysue]

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the

> > wedding, he laid down the following rules:

> >

> > "I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I

>don't

> > expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the

>table

> > unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting,

> > fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies

>and

> > don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any

> > comments?" His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just

> > understand that

>there

> > will be sex here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here

 

> > or not."

> >

> > ( SHE'S GOOD!)

> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

> > Marriage (Part II)

> >

> > Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th

>wedding

> > anniversary!

> > The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that

> > reads, 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever.' "Yeah?" she replies.

"When

> > you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads, "Here Lies My

Husband

>

> > Stiff At Last.'"

> >

> > (HE ASKED FOR IT!) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

> > Marriage (Part III)

> >

> > Husband (he's a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the

>breakfast

> > table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in

bed

>

> > either," and storms out of the house. After sometime he realizes he

> > was nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to

> > the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband says, "what

took

>

> > you so long to answer the phone?" She says, "I was in bed." "In bed

> > this early, doing what?" "Getting a second opinion!"

> >

> > (YEP, HE HAD THAT COMING, TOO!)

> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

> > Marriage (Part IV)

> >

> > A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is

>so

> > proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife," Mother of Six"

>in

> > spite of her objections.

> > One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go

>home

> > and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He

>shouts

> > at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home 'Mother of six?" His

wife,

> > irritated by her husband's lack of discretion shouts right back,

> > "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."

> >

> > (RIGHT ON, LADY!)

> >

 

[SexyNic]

i like the first two best!