Drive-thru ATM machines ....

[Nick G]

Barclays Bank is very pleased to announce that we are installing new Drive-thru ATMs where our customers will be able withdraw cash without leaving their vehicle.

 

To ensure that our customer's needs are met with the high level of service they have come to expect from UK's leading bank, we have conducted extensive behavioural studies to develop appropriate procedures for their use.

 

Customers will be able to apply whichever procedure has been developed for their particular group, and will be encouraged to remember the procedure in order to make best use of their visit to the Drive thru ATM. For instance, Male and Female procedures have been tailored to best reflect the behaviours of those particular groupings.

 

PROCEDURE FOR MALE CUSTOMERS:

 

1. Drive up to the ATM

2. Open the car window

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN

4. Enter amount of cash required and press "enter"

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt

6. Close window

7. Drive away

 

PROCEDURE FOR FEMALE CUSTOMERS:

 

1. Drive up to the ATM

2. Reverse back the required distance to align car with ATM

3. Re-start stalled engine

4. Open the car window

5. Find handbag, empty all contents onto the passenger seat and locate card

6. Turn radio down

7. Attempt to insert card into ATM

8. Open car door to allow easier access to ATM due to excessive distance from car to ATM

9. Insert card

10. Re-insert card the right way up

11. Ignore the sound of car horn from vehicle behind

12. Search contents of handbag (on passenger seat) to locate diary with PIN written on the inside back page under "Date of Birth"

13. Enter PIN

14. Press "cancel" and re-enter PIN

15. Enter amount of cash required and check make-up in rear view mirror

16. Drum fingertips on steering wheel, look at ATM for one minute and then press "enter"

17. Retrieve cash and receipt

18. Search contents of handbag (on passenger seat) to locate purse and place cash inside

19. Place receipt in back of cheque book

20. Re-check make-up

21. Drive forward two metres

22. Reverse back to ATM ignoring the sound of car horn from vehicle behind

23. Retrieve card

24. Search contents of handbag (on passenger seat) to locate card holder and place card in an empty slot

25. Drive two or three kilometres

26. Release hand brake

[Blink]

Lol, very funny

 

 

I saw drive-thru ATM's in the middle of nowhere in America, and just thought.......One bulldozer, 10 minutes, $100,000.

 

(A UK ATM will hold upto 50k when freshly loaded!!)