An Apology from the Founder

[James]

hey james

 

don't apologise (i'm not telling you what to do 8-)

 

i saw this message and i think, firstly, that it's great that you feel comfortable enough here to talk about this kind of stuff - a lot of people can't share feelings even with close friends so i think that's a sign that you really are in good shape.

 

if you don't mind some advice, let me ramble for a little while. take this at face value - if it helps, wonderful. if you think it's rubbish, that's great too.

 

i'm turning 35 this year and i discovered clubbing, E and electronic music about 5 years ago. it (the music especially, but the E to a big extent) changed my life. i don't know if you do E but much of this applies even if you don't.

 

i went through what i expect most people go through - an incredible E honeymoon where i could not concentrate at work because all i wanted to do was get to friday, get [censored] up and go dancing. i did that. a lot.

 

i still go out dancing and i still do E but i do it less regularly now - once or twice a month. in retrospect, i found that, while i was having the time of my life, the lifestyle was affecting me in ways i didn't realise. some of the symptoms you describe and lots more. i've found a more natural balance now between the clubbing/drugs thing and my 'normal' life. the whole experience taught me a lot of things, some of which i probably can't explain but, foremost:

 

- it really is about the music. E opened the door to my appreciation of electronic music (mostly different flavours of trance) but now i can go out clean and sober and still get high on choons.

 

- it's all about friends. i get [censored] up, loved up and have a great time with my friends but i know for sure 100% that we're not having a great time because we're high on E. we're having a great time because we're friends and the drugs help us experience that in a different way. it wouldn't work at all if we didn't have the solid platform of our friendships to build on.

 

if somebody put a gun to my head and said i had to make a choice - it's a no brainer. i'd give it all up for my friends.

 

so that's a bit of my ramble. it's clear you've got a lot of friends even just on this board so that's something to be really happy about.

 

your friends are a reflection of you - don't forget that.

 

a little more. hope this doesn't come across as too hippie but i live in San Francisco don't forget 8-)

 

somebody once gave me some really good advice. firstly, and this is harder than it sounds, find an hour, once in a while to be by yourself. go sit in a park, wherever and just be with yourself for an hour. no books, magazines. no walkman. just you alone. it's so worth it.

 

second:

 

if you are happy, laugh

if you are sad, cry

if you are annoyed, shout

 

so many people find it so hard to embrace their feelings and bottle it all up. that's just storing up trouble for the future.

 

anyway, i'm rambling and i'm sure you have more important things to do... you said it yourself - stress is avoidable.

 

the site is great and you have that to be proud of too.

 

ok, back to work for me. have a great week

 

alasdair

 

[ 04 June 2002, 19:46: Message edited by: alasdairm ]

[Signum]

well said dude

[James]

agreed, very well said! agree 100%!

 

James

[James]

I just wanted to apologise for my conduct over the last couple of weeks - I'm not making excuses (ok I am!) but I have definitely not been myself and I think I put it down to the stress of moving house the other weekend and going out a little too much and going WAY overboard on silly things. I have spent the last day and a half sleeping and drinking loads of pure orange juice and chocolates and I feel fecking amazing.

 

I appear to have my drive back which I orginally had when I started this site and was the reason I started it.

 

I think this is down to me remembering last Sunday night and the most amazing people who came - i.e. you lot. PEOPLE really do make the night for me now - its not just about the music anymore. And thing I love is that fact that the night is never over - we get on the board, we talk about it, we laugh at the pics and have a record of EVERY SINGLE night out we are gonna have - and I do hope there will be 100s if not 1000s (is that possible?!).

 

I said I was focused last week - I definitely wasn't I was arrogant and shot everyone down who spoke to me at work, at home and family - this is NOT what I'm about.

 

I am truly focused now and you will NOT be seeing me just going around taking pics of anybody anymore unless they have a real intention of joining the site. I simply had to do it at first to give people a reason to visit the site but now we have a nice REAL following and I'm quite happy for it to grow through word-of-mouth and to be honest the CTW goal has already been achieved because I DO have REGULAR nights out with many of you already and I HAVE finally found like-minded-clubbers. (by the way I didnt nick that saying, honest)

 

With Ibiza in front of us and hopefully other clubbing capitals we are truly going to be unique as I personally dont know of any other site out there trying to get new members on board for the sole fact we want them to be our life-long mates. Most sites I see are trying to sell something - we are just trying to sell happiness & memories. This is probably why I get annoyed sometimes when I feel I have to justify my efforts to people - it is quite clear from the main page what the mission is - unless you are 100% behind it (naturally, without thinking) then dont bother clicking anything other than 'back' !

 

I promise Ibiza will be the best experience of your clubbing career so far - especially if you haven't been before. I still dont know how its all gonna get organised as I'm always a bit last minute but I'm hoping we can all get a date we agree on and then just book anything we can - I think we should also get 3 jeeps and storm the island's loveliest beaches etc..

 

Neil ( nice1bruvva ) also mentioned about hooking up for day events which is an excellent idea - Kev and I have spoken about 'combo-weekenders' but in practice, at least at this stage, its proving difficult to get people to commit. So lets start of small and just have some day trips planned etc.. It really DOES make ALL the difference to me jumping up and down in a club next to someone who is really a mate - and not just someone who I nick a bit of water off every now and then!

 

James