A few CRAP blonde jokes

[Ginge]

> > > SPEEDING TICKET

> > > A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very

nicely if

> > > he could see her license.

> > > She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act

together.

> > > Yesterday you took my license away and today you expect me to show

it

> > > to you!"

.............................................

> > > EXPOSURE

> > > A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her

right

> > > breast hanging out.

> > > A policeman approaches her and says, "Ma'am, are you aware that I

could

> > > cite you for indecent exposure?"

> > > She says, "Why officer?"

> > > "Because your breast is hanging out." he says. She looks down and

says,

> > > "OH MY GOD, I left the baby on the bus again!"

.............................................

> > > KNITTING

> > > A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.

> > > Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind

the

> > > wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his

> > > flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window,

turned

> > > on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"

> > > "NO!" the blonde yelled back, "SCARF!"

..............................................

> > > BLONDE ON THE SUN

> > > A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The

Russian

> > > said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We were

the

> > > first on the moon!!" The Blonde said, "So what? We're going

> > > to be the first on the sun!"

> > > The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their

> > > heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!"

said

> > > the Russian.

> > > To which the Blonde replied, "We're not that stupid. We're going at

night!"

..............................................

> > > IN A VACUUM

> > > A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn.

She

> > > rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question

was,

> > > "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear

it?"

> > > She thought for a time and then asked, "Is the vacuum on or off?"

.............................................

> > > FINAL EXAM

> > > The blonde reports for her university final examination that

consists of

> > > yes/no type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall,

> > > stares at the question paper for five minutes and then, in a fit of

> > > inspiration, takes out her purse, removes a coin and starts tossing

the

> > > coin, marking the answer sheet: Yes, for Heads, and No, for Tails.

> > > Within half an hour she is all done, whereas the rest of the class

is

> > > still it out. During the last few minutes she is seen

> > > desperately throwing the coin, muttering and .

> > > The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks what is going on.

"I

> > > finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm rechecking my

answers."

.............................................

> > > THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!

> > > A girl was visiting her blond friend who had acquired two new dogs,

and

> > > asked her what their names were.

> > > The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was

> > > named Timex.

> > > Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"

> > > "HelOOOOOOO," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs!" ~~~~~

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[Spunkmonkey]

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