a fishy tale

[Fish]

A man was sitting on a London train eating a bag of fresh shrimp, ripping off

the heads and shells and then throwing them out of the window.

 

After he had gobbled a few of them down a woman opposite him said, "Would you

mind not doing that? It's disgusting to watch."

 

"Listen, love," He replied, "It's got nothing to do with you, I've paid my fare

for this journey and I'll do what I damn well want on this train." He carried

on ripping off the shells, throwing them out of the window and eating the

shrimp. Finally he finished the bag and settled back for a little sleep.

 

The woman then started some knitting and all the man could hear while he was

trying to sleep was the incessant clicking of her knitting needles.

 

After a while, he sits back up and says to the woman, "Could you stop that

noise, can't you see I'm trying to sleep?"

 

"It's got nothing to do with you," replies the woman, "I've paid my fare and

I'll do what I want on this train."

 

At that, the man grabbed the woman's knitting and threw it out of the window.

The woman immediately stood up and pulled the train alarm cord.

 

The man burst out laughing and said, "Ha ha, you'll get fined £200 for that!"

 

To which the old woman replied, "And you'll get six years after the police

smell your fingers."

 

 

 

 

[Lisa]

heard it before but still well funny