14 yr old secret abortion!!

[Lisa]

From Skynews.com

 

GIRL'S SECRET ABORTION

 

A mother whose 14-year-old daughter had a secret abortion talks with school advisors said it has left the girl "traumatised".

 

Michelle Smith fell pregnant in April and after consultation with a school health worker decided to get rid of the child.

 

 

Within days her mother, Maureen Smith, found out what was happening and the teenager changed her mind but it was too late.

 

She had taken the first of two pills as part of the chemical abortion process and the damage was irreparable.

 

Her mother is furious that despite not having been consulted over the abortion she is now left to pick up the pieces.

 

Mrs Smith, from Mansfield, Nottinghamshire, told the Daily Mail: "This is one of the worst things she will go through in her life and I knew nothing about it. I wasn't there to help or protect her.

 

"If my daughter had been truanting from school or causing trouble in the classroom I would have been informed.

 

"Yet she can go ahead and have an abortion which will affect her for the rest of her life and I have no say and no rights as a parent."

 

Michelle, whose identity has been revealed with her mother's consent, was with a steady boyfriend when she discovered she was pregnant.

 

She confided in a community health worker at Brunts School in Mansfield before starting the abortion process.

 

A local education authority spokeswoman said: "Teachers are not legally bound to inform parents if any young person tells a member of staff that she is pregnant and if there is to be any disclosure the teachers should seek consent from that pupil that they are working with."

 

 

 

 

 

 

what are your views on this??

[Alex]

14 years old and pregnant. This wasn't heading towards a fairy tale ending, whatever happened.

 

Her school acted irresponsibly, they should have contacted her mother and the girl should have been given proper guidence and support.

[Aaron]

They should have informed the mother on this, yeah i can imagine that the girl didnt want her parents to know,but can you imagine if there was a complication in the procedure and she developed a serious infection or worse?

 

Besides at 14 she is still a child and is therefore still legally under the responsibility of her parents. Not to mention that she actually broke the law when agreeing to have sex.

Edited May 13, 2004 by Aaron

[Lisa]

yes but on the flip side, she may not have wanted her mother to know at the start & it would appear her mother has no qualms about selling the story & splashing her daughters face & private life all over the papers!!

[Alex]

Just goes to show why she was pregnant at 14 with a mother like that.

[Lisa]

yep does pose that question Alex

[Aaron]

QUOTE

yes but on the flip side, she may not have wanted her mother to know at the start & it would appear her mother has no qualms about selling the story & splashing her daughters face & private life all over the papers!!

 

True! Burn the Mother!, Problem solved

Edited May 13, 2004 by Aaron

[Louise]

the sickening thing is this woman has had interviews with the news but is not willing to show her face yet she plasters her daughter all over the papers

 

 

[Alex]

Having not made the connection before now, between the news coming out and the mother not being told. It kinda makes sense now, why the mother wasn't told.

[Lisa]

QUOTE (Alex @ May 13 2004, 14:38)

Having not made the connection before now, between the news coming out and the mother not being told. It kinda makes sense now, why the mother wasn't told.

would appear so!!

[Louise]

think the family need to adress why she fell pregnant in the first place at the age of 14,

 

who was/is responcerble for sex education at that age? personally i think its a parents job, but lets face it.....how embarrassing is it for parent & child there more likely to listen to education in a fun classroom enviroment where they can ask stupid questions but get seriuos answers.........even if there laughing and joking throughout the lessons then at least it shows there listening

[Aaron]

Think the mother is too busy now counting the pounds that she's made from selling the story to the media

[Guest]

How can you say a child getting pregnant can be partly the mothers fault ?

 

IMHO it doesn't ALWAYS relate to how the child is brought up and what their family / parents / siblings are like.

 

Children grow up in many different ways to another child with a variety of DIFFERENT people. I am not being naieve but looking at this is another way instead of jumping the gun and useing the same kind of outlook as to 'it's the parents fault'. This deffinatley isn't always the case imo.

 

For example. I grew up with 2 friends that live by me. Both sisters, one older than the other. Myself and my two brothers and sister also grew up with them in childhood and we would always do everything together. Their parents catered for their every need and never wanted for nothing, as with my siblings and my parents. We (and my two friends) never had a rough upbringing and lived (and still do) in a great location where everyone is nice and it's not your average 'rough estate' where peopel take drugs at an early age, commit crimes and the rest of it.

 

I had sex education in school and so did my two friends. They never had 'problems' that would take send them off the rails and do stupid things that would be blamed for a disturbing upbringing.

 

The youngest one of my friends got pregnant at the age of 16 but was having sex at the age of 14 (with a steady b/f who she is still with now, and she is now 18 with two young children). No-one is to blame for her getting pregnant. Not her parents and no-one else. She consented to it, she was on the pill and taking precautions when having sex, but accidents can happen. But just because she got pregnant, as I say, is not the blame of her parents or how they brought her up as a child.

 

It IS silly to get prgnant at such a young age, as your life is no longer mapped out in front of you, and also, your body / hormones are still in the devleoping process, where emotions run wild, stress and depression can then kick in at that age, as being at such a young age, unless you had an unfortunate upbringing and had to bring yourself and family up at that age, then they are not all that clued up about such things which can be VERY scarey for them.

 

Also, look at the TV for instance, and also PORN. These type of things children DO happen to watch i.e - newspapers they find, films they watch where they happen to see two people being 'rude', then there is, hearing their parents having sex in bed, hearing about their mates losing their virginity. This does inflict on the younger generation, so it is NOTHING to do with blaming parents. UNLESS they are actually tought the 'birds and the bees'. But to be honest, how many parents actually DO sit their kids down and talk to them about sex / safe sex etc ? I know for one I would deffinatly be doing this with my future children but it is somewhat embarassing for some parents to actually do this, as Luu clearly points out. Yes their is sex education, but peopel do tend to get embarassed in school when watching certain videos about how people have sex / what happens etc - but I don't think there is enough education being preached about SAFE SEX. (or at least sinse I last heard about sex eucation it wasn't all about teaching kids how to be safe).

 

But taking in that this mother was not informed about this child having an abortion IMO is very very wrong. That mother should have been informed fromthe very start, because it's not the social worker bringing up / having to live with this child and it certainly isn't the social worker who has to be now handle this childs emotions / stress etc. The mother has the better / stringer bond with their child and has done sinse the child was born.

 

All this stuff today about parental concent and parental guidance just seems to now be a complete waste of time considering this should have forst and foremost been addressed to the mother, when it clearly wasn't.

 

Maybe I have the wrong opinion on all of this, but this is only my opinion, and I am open to hear all views that go against mine.

 

Maria

 

[Ian Cashman]

at the end of the day, sad as it is, the silly cow was stupid to get pregnant at that age...

 

blame is to be laid on her.

the school fucked up

the mother is a silly cow for making such a song and dance about it. shes prolly scarred the poor kid more than anything else..

 

this should not warrant being national news

[Mark]

my mum was on 13 when she had me - but she knew she couldn;t give me a proper upbrining so she decided to put me up for adoption.

 

Makes me wonder where i would be and what i would be now if she had decided to of kept me