smacking & punishement for kids

[Louise]

does smacking work?

 

what else could a parent/carer do instead of physical punishment to get the message across?

[LiquidEyes]

I think smacking is acceptable under certain circumstances, especially with younger children who are still learning what's right and wrong, or even in situations where they are putting themselves in danger.

 

However it's a difficult one to police. It's ridiculous making it illegal because of a few extreme cases where parents have completely abused their children. On the flipside, where do you draw the line as to what's acceptable?

[Guest]

i think sometimes the only way to teach kids is to scare them into good behaviour.

smacking is imo the most effective form of that.

 

its more about the kids being scared of getting smacked than actually dishing out the pain though

[LiquidEyes]

QUOTE (Mr_Happy @ May 18 2004, 09:12)

its more about the kids being scared of getting smacked than actually dishing out the pain though

LOL, do you reckon?

You mean it's not okay to enjoy it?

[LiquidEyes]

I think discipline is all about moderation. Parents who yell at their kids constantly invariably have sod all control over them. Likewise, constantly smacking them is going to have little benefit in the long run.

 

If you learn to respect your parents' feelings from an early age, I reckon that's a much more powerful tool. I used to dread the idea of upsetting my mum if I was really naughty ... not because she'd hit or shout at me, but because she's make me feel guilty as hell!

 

Call me old-fashioned, but I'm appalled when I see parents swearing at their kids. Nobody is above getting emotional, but exhibiting anger towards a child should be the exception rather than the rule. Likewise I think it's pretty piss-poor when children answer back to their parents and get away with it ... how do they think their kids are going to end up if they tolerate that?

[Guest]

QUOTE (LiquidEyes @ May 18 2004, 09:15)

QUOTE (Mr_Happy @ May 18 2004, 09:12) its more about the kids being scared of getting smacked than actually dishing out the pain though LOL, do you reckon? You mean it's not okay to enjoy it?

[Guest]

QUOTE (LiquidEyes @ May 18 2004, 09:22)

I think discipline is all about moderation. Parents who yell at their kids constantly invariably have sod all control over them. Likewise, constantly smacking them is going to have little benefit in the long run. If you learn to respect your parents' feelings from an early age, I reckon that's a much more powerful tool. I used to dread the idea of upsetting my mum if I was really naughty ... not because she'd hit or shout at me, but because she's make me feel guilty as hell! Call me old-fashioned, but I'm appalled when I see parents swearing at their kids. Nobody is above getting emotional, but exhibiting anger towards a child should be the exception rather than the rule. Likewise I think it's pretty piss-poor when children answer back to their parents and get away with it ... how do they think their kids are going to end up if they tolerate that?

100% agree with everything you've said there

(even if it does make me sound like a sheep)

[Alex]

I quickly learnt that being smacked wasn't so bad, I could take the pain. All it did was make me angry and more inclined to try what I did wrong again, all I knew is that it pissed my parents off and a smacking never explained why it pissed them off.

 

I always found that when I was asked to explain my actions, that it was a far better way of learning right from wrong than being hit. May not work for all, but for some it does.

[LiquidEyes]

^ agreed. I would only ever advocate physical punishment as a last resort, or in "emergency situations" for relatively young children.

[Treza]

well ive tried most things, admittedly i am too soft on my little boy but giving him a smack doesnt always work as i dont hit him hard enough to make a point, however making him sit on the bottom step until he can behave apropriately has proved to be a little more effective, he does still walk all over me though, and he's only 3 1/2......

 

so im open to any suggestions too..................

[Treza]

i have also tried the removal of the toys thing, but he is entertaineed by ANYTHING so it dont work

[ChrisT]

fear of the bogey man

[Aaron]

I was a little shit when i was younger, and my mum used to tell me that I would end up going to Prison when i was older the way I was acting, and if that happened they would disown me!

Edited May 18, 2004 by Aaron

[Guest Kether]

QUOTE (Treza @ May 18 2004, 16:14)

well ive tried most things, admittedly i am too soft on my little boy but giving him a smack doesnt always work as i dont hit him hard enough to make a point, however making him sit on the bottom step until he can behave apropriately has proved to be a little more effective, he does still walk all over me though, and he's only 3 1/2...... so im open to any suggestions too..................

If they're naughty, it's usually to get attention. Deny them attention when they're naughty and give them attention when they're well behaved.

 

You have to stick to it though and it's hard when the kid is playing up.

[Treza]

i shall try it thanx, it cant work worse than my ideas!!!!