Woman vs men!!!

[tidy_bitch]

Women

 

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your boyfriend along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom.

3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out your gut so that you can complain and whine even more about how you're getting fat.

4. Get in the shower. Look for facecloth, arm cloth, leg cloth,

long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

5. Wash your hair once with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.

6. Wash your hair again with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.

7. Condition your hair with Cucumber and Lamfrey conditioner

enhanced with natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes.

8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten

minutes until red raw.

9. Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body wash.

10. Rinse conditioner off hair (this takes at least fifteen

minutes as you must make sure that it has all come off).

11. Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but

decide to get it waxed instead.

12. Scream loudly when your boyfriend turns the tap on in the kitchen and you

lose the water pressure.

13. Turn off shower.

14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray with deodreant.

15. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small African Country. Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.

16. Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit. Attack with nails or tweezers if found.

17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

18. If you see your boyfriend along the way, cover up any exposed areas and then rush to bedroom to spend an hour and a half getting dressed.

 

Men

 

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your girlfriend along the way, shake wiener at her making the "woo" sound.

3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to see if you have pecs (no). Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror.

4. Get in the shower.

5. Don't bother to look for a washcloth (you don't use one).

6. Wash your face.

7. Wash your armpits.

8. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.

9. Wash your privates and surrounding area.

10. Wash your butt, leaving hair on the soap bar.

11. Shampoo your hair (do not use conditioner).

12. Make a shampoo Mohawk.

13. Pull back shower curtain and look at yourself in the mirror.

14. Pee (in the shower, of course).

15. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on the floor because you left the curtain hanging out of the tub the whole time.

16. Partially dry off.

17. Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles. Admire wiener size again.

18. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.

19. Leave bathroom fan and light on.

20. Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass your girlfriend, pull off the towel, grab your wiener, say, "Yeah baby," and thrust your pelvis at her.

21. Throw wet towel on the bed. Take 2 minutes to get dressed.

[Cherry]

Read that before a couple of times, but it's class

[tidy_bitch]

opps oh well always a good read huh?

[DJ Elemental]

we're not all slobs..

[BenRW]

DJ_Elemental said:

we're not all slobs..

 

mark u r tho

 

the state of ur chalet @ tw4 was awful and dont blame the girls cos we all know it was u

[tidy_bitch]

lol i wasnt saying that men ir slobs, i thought it was funny to post and i thought id share it with u fine people

[DJ Elemental]

benrostwood said:

DJ_Elemental said:

we're not all slobs..

 

mark u r tho

 

the state of ur chalet @ tw4 was awful and dont blame the girls cos we all know it was u

 

 

it was helen and the silly string!!

 

haha i wonder if they managed to scrape all that off the walls

[tidy_bitch]

question elemental? Do u produce tunes that r on vynel? (spelt wrong) or 4 living type thing if u get wot i mean professionaly

[CreamyC]

How many times is this going to do the rounds.

[tidy_bitch]

Whats that supposed to mean??

[CreamyC]

tidygirl1 said:

Whats that supposed to mean??

 

It means its done more rounds than George Foreman.

[DJ Elemental]

tidygirl1 said:

question elemental? Do u produce tunes that r on vynel? (spelt wrong) or 4 living type thing if u get wot i mean professionaly

 

i do have various singles on vinyl yes - no massive releases as of yet thou - hoping to change all that later this hear

 

else i enginner track for DJ's or produce tunes for commerical needs such as sky tv - have done tunes for Games-Network and Extreme (sports Channel) and various other random peeps

[BenRW]

DJ_Elemental said:

benrostwood said:

DJ_Elemental said:

we're not all slobs..

 

mark u r tho

 

the state of ur chalet @ tw4 was awful and dont blame the girls cos we all know it was u

 

 

it was helen and the silly string!!

 

haha i wonder if they managed to scrape all that off the walls

 

im talking bout the other mess, ur mess. an dont say u dont know wot im talking bout cos u blatantly do

[DJ Elemental]

the party poppers where tashas!

[BenRW]

DJ_Elemental said:

the party poppers where tashas!

 

not the party poppers